(Essay)

Over our lifetime we come across many people, including parents, siblings, friends, neighbors, office colleagues, and our significant others. Life is complicated. There are times when we involve ourselves in discussions with people over various topics. Tensions arise when our views conflict with others. Whether we are on vacation with family when discussing the choice of options for what to eat for dinner or where to go, different interpretations of what we say and/or misunderstandings of our intent. Even between a couple remembrance of the details of a long-ago event may cause tension. Sometimes you may be thinking out loud about your plan and that is interpreted as an opinion. Most of the time it is difficult to come to a consensus. Other times one of our friends may act in a way we may not like and make our judgement of why they acted that way.

So, what is the approach to maintaining a happy relationship over a long period? As the actress Audrey Hepburn said, “Happiness is health and a short memory!.” Misunderstandings get solved over time. What is the use of maintaining a grudge over a long time? Just forget something that has happened and go on with your life. When we come to know the details of why someone said something or why he/she behaved the way they did our thinking about the incident changes. If you don’t like what someone, including your spouse, says something that you don’t like you can have a cordial discussion instead of getting mad and throwing tantrums. Then after a few moments later forget it as if you have lost your memory. One must realize that in most cases it is a different interpretation, not a grudge that someone holds against you. If we keep getting mad at every instance of a disagreement there will be no end to it. If we lose friends, relatives, or colleagues there will be no meaning to our lives.

The relationship is a two-way street. We cannot control how another person behaves. We can only control our behavior. So, get mad for an instant if you are upset at something, but keep an open mind and forget it soon or as soon as you can and move on. You will be happier. We only have one life to live and we should aim at making it the best it can be.